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Chase Bank Now Offering Cash Back on Cocaine Purchases
Good news, cocaine lovers—you can now score your blow and be financially responsible with Chase Bank’s newest credit card offer. The Chase Coke Card is the only credit card that offers 10% cashback on every cocaine purchase made. This is a substantial increase in rewards over competitors and even other Chase cards. For...
He leaves his clothes all around the house. You find empty beer cans everywhere. He tracks mud into the house, he farts all the time, he doesn’t brush his teeth every day… in short, he’s a gross man. But you love him. You might not even be able to explain why. Your friends might think you’ve gone insane when you start...
You work hard at your job. People just don’t understand how much it takes to be a part-time rap artist/future best-selling author-in-progress (it took days to write those two pages of your novel, but you can’t rush genius). At the end of the day, you just want to put your feet up, kick back, and watch TV. No one can expect...
If you want to make someone contractually spend the rest of their life with you, put a ring on it.

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